Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Himesh, Himesh everywhere

Coming soon… Jai Mata Di! Let’s Rock! - The Himesh Reshammiya Tribute Album. A nod to the all-pervading presence and ubiquitousness of a man who seamlessly blends religion and rock-n-roll in a catchy all-exhorting slogan. And a way of us fans saying thanks to the man who gave such great classics like aashiq banaya aapne and made Tanushree sizzle to his beat. A fitting tribute to a man who made history by becoming the first music director ever to win the Filmfare Award for Best Playback Singer. By the way, if you haven’t picked up Aaapka suroor yet, what are you waiting for? Get it today. Ah! Yes, coming back….

A mammoth 2-CD pack, the Himesh Reshammiya Tribute Album will feature 4 great songs and 32 (yes, thirty two) great tracks. Total value for your money. Each great song will have eight versions – original edit, unplugged version, remix version, a mix of the remix, an instrumental version, an acapella version, a ringtone version and a dhoomph-dhoomph heavy bass play-it-loud-like-the-northies-when-cruising-down-brigade-road version.

Triskaidekophiliacs rejoice! Thanks for this cow. The album will also have a couple of Bonus Tracks – yet another version of the hit song - ‘Naam hai 13 13’ or for those who don’t think in Hindi ‘Naam hai tera tera’ and a new song ‘Cap ke neeche kya hai?” Look out for the music videos featuring Himesh Reshammiya on all music channels. News is that Emraan Hasmi has agreed to be in the video. So get ready for more Himesh Reshammiya. And rush to your nearest music store today and pick up Jai Mata Di! Let’s Rock! - The Himesh Reshammiya Tribute Album, and get a free Himesh Reshammiyya poster, Himesh Reshammiya T-shirt, a paste-on Himesh Reshammiya-style stubble. The whole Himesh Reshammiya kit. Cap not included.

And if you haven’t had enough of Himesh Reshammiya yet, here he is my favourite composer/singer/video star Himesh Reshammiya once more.
We wish you all the best sir. Jai Mata Di! Let’s Rock!

Monday, March 27, 2006

If you are of the kind that does not mind wasting your time in inconsequential causes, you might want to consider signing this.
Yours truly
Petitioner No. 49779

A continuum of absolutes

I am Shenoy. I am Shenoy’s son. I am Shenoy’s grandson. Shenoy was my great-grandfather. I will be Shenoy’s father. I am Shenoy. And I refuse to be the weak link.

And you thought human cultural existence is not a continuous nonspatial succession. It is…a continuum, but one in which the parts and portions are distinct and distinguishable from adjacent parts and portions. In their own time. We are the continuing. We shall be continued.

"...I’m coming home to my family
Where I can be strong
Be who I planned to be
Within me my ancestry
Givin’ me continuity........
......This is what my daddy told me
I wished he would hold me
A little more than he did
But he taught me my culture
And how to live positive
I never wanna shame
The blood in my veins and bring pain
to my sweet grandfather's face
in his resting place
I make haste to learn and not waste
everything my forefathers earned in tears
for my culture..."
from 1 Giant Leap's My Culture.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Makes you Think

Best American Weblog, Best Topical Weblog, Best Community Weblog, Best New Weblog AND Weblog of the Year : One blog won all this at this year's Weblog Awards: the 2006Bloggies. It's billed as an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard, and it's called PostSecret. These secrets can be anything and you should see some of the secrets that people send in. Makes you think. Frank Warren has also seleceted some of the "best secrets" and published it (other people's secrets which they shared with him) in a book. Makes you think. So, what secrets do you want to get off your chest? Ah yes, the postcard shown above by the way, you won't find on the blog. It's now in an online gallery. Makes you think.

Hmmmm....a collection of words which are often omitted from dictionaries, and are in danger of being eliminated from the English language. What! You must be joking, i actually know a few people who use these, half their vocabulary seems to come from The Grandiloquent Dictionary


Some have said it's the best Batman movie ever made. Just a rider, these comments were made before Batman:Begins came out. The best Batman movie ever made. No not Burton. But Sandy Collora. Even though it was made in 2003 and events have gone futher, nothing can take away anything from Batman: Dead End, a fan film by Sandy Corrolla. Great feel. Truly batman-ish and so totally Gotham. And in just 8 minutes. Shot in four days on a $30,000 budget, B:DE packs in Batman (duh!), Joker, Alien (yes!) and Predator (yes! yes!). How will puritanical Batman fans take it? But ok. Let a man have his fun. And if Collora's words are to be believed (which we must) even Alex Ross said something to the effect of 'best batman movie'. After all, it's a fan making a movie. Not money milking movie studios. What you waiting for? Here it is. Watch it now! Just hit play below.

A Dic-K's tale

The DIC(K) is made up of what was once a part of CONgress. Then Grand Old Man decided to take castrate CONgress in God's Own Country and the DIC(K) came apart from the main body. A powerful organ was taken away from CONgress. CONgress thought, "I don't need DIC(K). I have had no balls anyway, that too for over 50 years. So what use is DIC(K)?". But...DICK(K) Head then realised that on it's own any DICK(K) can't do much, so started looking for friends. And as everybody knows, all DICK(K)s have close neighbours in the form of arseholes. So DICK(K) Head turned to areseholes. And two nuts, especially the left one. Also, DIC(K) started having performance problems. But then, soon, CONgress wanted DICK(K) back. CONgress and DIC(K) then flirted around. CONgress made statements like, "We are deliberating on what to do with DIC(K)." Then CONgress Owner, and Commander of the Ball-less Brigade, Red Sonja (Author of 'The Sari State of CONgress' and soon to be immortalised in SICKOphantic's book The fArt of Sacrifice) said she wants DIC(K). "Get me DIC(K)", she thunders. Hearing orders, CONgress starts sends feelers (many feeers) to DIC(K) Head. And DIC(K) likes being felt up. So many toddy kuppis and midnight masala sessions later, CONgress and DIC(K) decide to get together, with CONgress using DIC(K) to fuck more people. So that is how things stand. Or are erect. Await further developments. Till then, DIC(K) is safe in the hands of the CONgress.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Speaking of inners

Those who live in glasshouses should not change their clothes with their lights on. Unfortunately, the Congress Party, I mean, Sonia ‘NRI’ Gandhi seems not to have known about this. Which is why they’re in the state they’re in. At a time when parallels were being drawn with the Emergency Days, and left with no choice but to resign, she did what she had to resign. But still saying “sacrifice”. And the definitions of the word ‘martyr’ seem to be changing. Sonia, I mean the Congress Party, thinks us all a bunch of fools, which I guess we are. That’s it. For a nice take on Sonia, I mean, the Congress Party, no, I mean, Sonia, go to the communal cow as he goes about Deconstructing Sonia, with his trademark puns, neologism and spelling mistakes.

This is Inner Voice Ver2.0. Go, know more about the high falutin’ Inner Voice Ver1.0. And yes, NRI means Not Required Italian.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Mera Rang de Basanti…

During one of our many conversations, the Communal Cow made a very valid point. He is of the firm belief that all is lost on a generation that needs a popcorn entertainer to tell them about their heroes, their history and those who came before us. To paraphrase him, a generation that needs aids such as this to rekindle their pride is doomed and is useless. Which is why he has come up with his own version of Rang De Basanti’s byline, “A generation weakens” he says. I think I quite agree. But that’s not to take away anything from the movie and Mehra’s efforts. We do what we feel should be done. But at least the Communal Cow got the point that the movie was trying to make. Which brings us to the point of this post. And it’s not a review (there’s enough of them already), but merely an attempt to clarify certain aspects of the movie, considering how many people have fallen for the red herrings, so to speak. So let us try and clear the fog about this masaledaar hindi movie that has all of us talking.

Is RDB about crashing MIGs? Is it about our brave pilots who lay down their lives while piloting those flying coffins? Yes, some would say. “Did you not see the last slide that came on before the credits started rolling? It said that the movie is in honour of our brave pilots.” They will tell you. And it’s at this point that we need to understand that at the end of the day, RDB is a film, a movie. And all good movies have something that is known as a ‘plot device’ which is simply put, a thing/concept/person brought into the narrative to influence/ advance the plot of the movie. Now this MIG plot device (in the context of the movie) could have been anything else. It could have been a train accident, an innocent victim caught in a smuggling racket, a viruddh-type justice denied angle or even a clichéd gangster thingy. That’s the point. These are all clichés. And would these alternatives have grabbed your attention as much as the MIG angle did? Think not. Any film maker, even if it is Vikram Bhatt, will try to bring something new and unique into his movie, and with RDB the case would have been more so, and Mehra could not have chosen a better plot device. Also, by choosing this particular one, he has also managed to bring attention to the state of our air force’s planes and our pilots. But this specific thing is just peripheral to the point that RDB is trying to make. And yes, the last slide is just an afterthought (I think). Remember the rouble that RBD got into with the defence ministry? Most likely, it was just inserted there to calm the nerves of those in the ministry who (like the people who inspired this post) thought that Mehra is making fun of the Indian armed forces.

So getting back to our point, what this MIG plot device also helps do is take the story forward by linking the MIGs with the Defence Minister who is (quite intelligently) equated with Gen. Dyer. Now, here again many people think that this comparison calls for a total suspension of belief and is totally far fetched. Two things. Firstly, it’s not as farfetched as you would think. Instead of our enemies from outside, our enemies today are our own people. Think about it. And secondly, don’t forget that RDB is a masala movie, not a historical documentary. But it achieves more than a hundred other masala movies could.

Another objection that some people have raised is that through RDB, Mehra is telling us all to take up arms and go around killing politicians/other assorted termites in the system. No he’s not. But it wouldn’t be such a bad thing now, would it? Anyway, if you see the movie, and listen carefully, the answer is right there. Join the IAS. Get into politics. Join the police force. Change the system. Ho many people will you kill? Kill the fault in the system, not the propagators. Again here, it should be pointed out, the assassination of the minister is just another plot device, albeit a truly farfetched one practically. But like Bhagat Singh himself said, “Jo ooncha sunte hain, unko sirf dhamake ki awaaz sunayideti hai…” Close enough, I guess. And this is exactly what RDB tries to do. Be an explosion that opens the eyes of at least some people. But at the end of the day, let us not forget, it’s just another bollywood movie starring Aamir Khan, with music by A.R.Rahman, and that the MIGs and the ministers are just plot devices.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Hinglish? You said...

This post was actually sparked off by a comment in response to Jugular Bean’s comment on the FORK OFF! post. Thought it should be pursued further and here is the result in this format:
Film name
Hindi song
English translation

Apna banana hai…
This is our banana…

Bahaaron phool barsaao, mera mehboob aaya hai…
O spring, shower flowers, my beloved is a nanny (aaya)…

Yaara Dildaara
Bin tere sanam…
These bins are yours, darling…

China Town
Baar baar dekho, hazaar baar dekho…
Look at bar bar, look at a thousand bars…

Mera kuch saamaan tumhare paas pada hai...
Some of my saamaan is still with you…

So gay yeh jahaan…
This world is so gay…

Teesri Ankh
Chugg de punjabi…
Give me a chugg, you punjabi...

Rock Dancer
You are my chicken fry, you are my fish fry...
You are my chicken fry, you are my fish fry...

Raju Chacha
Tune mujhe pehchaana nahin...
The tune did not recognise me...

Yeh Mohabbat Hai
Bechain mera yeh dil hai…
This heart of mine is without chains…

Well. Guess that's enough for now. Please add to the list. Uuse comments box. Smile.

1 of only 4

If someone wears this limited edition t-shirt, is he homophobic? or is it just nascent xenophobia? Ah! But how it pleases me.

Beauty? What beauty?

For years, beauty pageants, have been going on. And forever they have been mired in controversy. The women’s rights organisations blame beauty pageants for ‘exploiting women’. While others have gone on record saying that events such as Miss India are nothing but skin shows. To all of which assorted organisers have come back with the same reply, “…not an exploitation of women. Don’t call it a beauty pageant, because intelligence also plays a big role in a [half-naked] woman winning a title…” So on and so forth. And wonder of wonders! This time the organisers of the Ponds Femina Miss India contest have actually stayed true to their words. They have gone beyond mere anatomy, bikinis and good make-up. Just take a look at the winners. They definitely don’t look like the winners of a ‘beauty’ pageant. Far from it. And no amount of make-up can save them it seems. Also, looks like reality TV has also taken its toll, and the winners who got the maximum votes got them from the congenitally blind.

Finally ‘inner beauty’ has been rewarded over shallow, skin-deep Maybelline/L’Oreal-enhanced external beauty. Has to be. There’s not much that’s externally beautiful about this year’s Miss India winners. But they ‘look’ intelligent. And if you’re thinking that intelligent women have to be necessarily unattractive, think again. Take a look at yash birla. So, has a new age dawned? Can we expect an IQ round at next year’s pageant? Will Mensa be a proud sponsor? Shall we see dissertations being presented? It’s too soon to tell. But a fine start has been made. On an a side note, hopefully next year’s bunch of ‘intelligent women’ will a lot more pleasing on the eye. After all, it is us poor folk who will soon (very soon) have to watch these crusaders against poverty and champions of the underprivileged in a hot-n-steamy bollywood item number.

Monday, March 20, 2006

the next best buy

Tracking down movies by one's favourite parallell cinema director is difficult enough. And next to impossible if that director happens to be HE of the HS films fame (yes, our old friend). Will soon get hold of his next classic. But till i see it and put up a detailed review/analysis, a synopsis of the film from the UltraIndia website will do. Go here. Split your sides.
PS: And for those of you philistines who do not know HS, it's Harinam Singh.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

blast of the past

shot this at the gallery of the Cellular Jail. And like they say, a picture's worth a thousand words... especially if it includes a wordy description.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

They gaze down at me from their lofty heights. People my age and younger. People who did and died. They stare at me through images captured in time. They seem to be telling me, “We did as much as we could. Now it’s your turn.” I hear them. And I feel ashamed. But I try to be escapist about what I cannot do. Yet. “At least your enemy had a face. Mine doesn’t. You were fighting outsiders. I have to fight my own people, my brothers. You fought for a noble cause. What cause have I, except mine own?” They will not think bad of me if I continue this way. But I will. They’ll forgive my apathy and selfishness. But I cannot. There must a cause greater than yourself. And I think I know.

one billion Indians?

Who is an Indian? How does one become an Indian? And stay that way. Or is it a question of Indian-ness or rather India-ness. Who is an Indian? One who knows the culture, the history, the traditions of this land and respects it. Or one who knows many Indian languages. Or one who considers other Indians his brothers and sisters, his people? Is he an Indian who identifies himself with this land? Or does one become Indian by virtue of just having been born in this general geographical area designated ‘India’ on the world map? But then again, firangs born here are not considered Indians. So while people born to ‘Indians’ here in this land can still be considered Indians without even knowing our culture, no inkling of her history, and speaking no ‘Indian’ languages, why not call them Indians who know more about her language, culture and have assimilated ‘India’ into their life better than those Indians born here? Indian. Is it just a geographical tag? Or something more? Then where does the term 'Bharatiya' which is the normal accepted Hindi translation of Indian figure? How many shades of grey exist between being an Indian and not being an Indian, since by instinct we seem to (apparently) know. Which brings back the original question: Who is an Indian?

high on speed

If sixty is their starting speed (as is hinted at from their album cover), expect a lot more from Speedometer 60 in the days to come. Music has progressed, and more than ever bands are coming out with albums that just refuse to be pigeonholed into convenient niches or genres as they are called. This band takes it one step further, with even their individual songs on their self-titled debut album refusing to lend themselves easily to any particular tag. Blues, bluegrass, country, folk, David Bowie, metal, rock (in all its forms). All this and more in one album. Phew!

Speedometer 60. Just another bunch of 4 Liverpudlians who seems to be able to translate their seemingly disparate (and fiercely held) tastes – from comics and music to political leanings and favourite literature – into a seamless blend of great music. The album opens with Up the Ante, a post-punk kind of sound mixed with a smattering of Seattle strains of the Soundgarden variety. Throw in some rage against the machine and a garnish of Janis Joplin and you get the idea. And this is exactly why their songs are so tough to review and best heard yourself.

And there’s a bonus as well. Actually three of them. Awesome covers of Silverchair’s World upon your shoulders, Joan Baez’s Diamond and rust and Robert Johnson’s Me and the Devil blues.

So media-shy and publicity-shy that they refuse to even have a website, Speedometer 60 is by far the best buy in a long time. Total value for money. And then some because it happens to be a gift. Speedometer 60 is not just another blip on the radar, it’s a massive behemoth. One more thing, the musical adventures apart, the sheer inaccessibility of this album will definitely make some people look for it and own it, if only to say, “Have you heard Speedometer 60?”

Monday, March 06, 2006

time framed

Why the long gap between this post and the last? You asked. Here's why (in no particular order): The Andamans. The post-Andaman holiday hangover. Work. Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos – Expansion Pack: The Frozen Throne. Friends. Research. Relatives. Family. Solitude. More family. Return to Castle Wolfenstein. Comics. Music. Movies. Agonising. Prince of Persia: Warrior Within. Coffee House. Weekends. Life.