Friday, February 14, 2014

Love, love everywhere, but not a Lover to love - The Auto Raja special

A collection of some of the finest love advice and aphorisms from Bangalore’s very own Love Gurus.
Love cannot be seen it is true [but] Lover can you not see [?]
[Once] Love is found, Lover [also] will you not get [?]
udigiru love andre
nail polish thara thilkondire
udugaru love andre
pranakintha echgi thilkonthare
(If) girls think of love as nail polish *wah wah*
boys value love more than life itself
Shi So Beutiful
I Don’t Like It
The charms of modern girls’ luck-u…
…can change a boy’s destiny (and come unstuck-u)

from mother….LIFE
from lover….DEATH

Waste it [a rose] not on the hair of a girl who knows not the value of love,
Use it instead to adorn the tomb of the boy who gave their life for love…..
if you don’t get what you love; love what you get’
but a true, more correct literal translation in English would be:
Rather than being a slave to the one you choose,
Be the king and rule over the heart that chose you
To never see you again, my heart into stone I turned,
Now that the stone hath become a rock in the end
From which I could sculpt your beauteous visage I see within,
How can forget you oh my beloved, my friend?! 
and finally a (dis)honourable mention....

Tuesday, February 04, 2014

The very best (read funny) "questions" from the #AskCarrick Q&A

So it all started harmlessly with this tweet on 3rd Feb:
#mufc's official match programme United Review is interviewing Michael Carrick. Tweet us your questions for the midfielder with #AskCarrick.
But what Man Utd and Michael Carrick hadn't factored in when they asked for this Twitter Q&A was the sheer bad timing of it all. Just a day after the defeat to Stoke City. More than the trolls from Arsenal, City and Chelsea who were waiting to pounce on this, Man Utd fans took it upon themselves to vent, and boy did they get things off their chest. But to their credit, they did it in the funniest way possible, by trolling not just him, but the whole team. So here, goes the best #AskCarrick tweets (so far)

Of course, this was a Q&A about Carrick, so there was enough about Carrick himself, with a special focus on his uncanny ability to pass the ball back to the goal keeper.
#askcarrick in what game was your most memorable pass back to your keeper?
If a ball leaves your boot travelling at 30km per hour at 3 pm on saturday, how long does it take to reach De Gea? #AskCarrick
AskCarrick Would Moyes consider putting DeGea upfront, so that you can pass the ball theright way? #LFC

#askcarrick have you tried wearing your kit backwards to see if it will help you pass the ball forward?
#AskCarrick If you had a penalty to win the game, who would you pass it to?
#AskCarrick How do you do that trick where you disappear in big games?
#AskCarrick If you had the chance to join Sunderland, Do you think @ManUtd would sell you to a rival?

Of course, the match against Stoke - and his part in it thereof, where the first goal was due to a deflection off him - just HAD to be mentioned!
#askcarrick hi have you ever thought of turning your back on United like you did on Charlie Adam’s free kick
Why didn't you block the freekick by your balls? #AskCarrick

But the best (again, read funny) 'questions' were reserved for teammate, the fan favourite - Tom 'sideways'Cleverley  - and the rest of the Manchester United (non)players
#AskCarrick How many of your teammates have signed the Cleverley petition? Be honest
#AskCarrick if you could drop one player from the team how would you tell Cleverley?
Do you die a little inside when you're looking for someone to pass to and Tom Cleverley is to your left  #AskCarrick
#AskCarrick Do you get depressed when you see Tom Cleverley's name on the team sheet and realize you're gonna have to play with 10 men?
#AskCarrick on a scale of Tom Cleverley to 10, how bad is Ashley Young?
Do you ever look at Young, Cleverly, Smalling, Welbeck & question the point of living? #AskCarrick
#askcarrick if someone held a gun to your head &asked do you want to to play with Cleverly orFellaini....would you be buried or cremated??

And of course, the Juan and only decent signing we've made this season - Mata too made the cut, drawing a lot of 'sympathy'
How many times has Mata tried to make a run for it since signing? #AskCarrick
#AskCarrick in the team hotel in Stoke, could you hear Mata crying himself to sleep?
So there you go. In the end, and it is fitting to end this with a tweet from @HEYsenses who summed it all up by tweeting '#AskCarrick hashtag must be the second worst decision
taken by @ManUtd after appointing Moyes as a manager #mufc'
and before I forget, a special HT to fellow Utd fan Jithamithra Raghavendrachar for bringing this hashtag to my notice. much LOL was had.